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Day #41 - The Shadow

7/31/2014

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In honor of the radio program the Shadow that premiered today in 1930 I will give you my version of The Shadow -"Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts of men? The Shadow knows!"
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Day #40 - Hitchhiker's Guide to The Galaxy by Douglas Adams read by a Car Salesman

7/30/2014

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  • The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy has a few things to say on the subject of towels.
    A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitch hiker can have.
    Partly it has great practical value — you can wrap it around you for warmth as you bound across the cold moons of Jaglan Beta; you can lie on it on the brilliant marble‐sanded beaches of Santraginus V, inhaling the heady sea vapours; you can sleep under it beneath the stars which shine so redly on the desert world of Kakrafoon; use it to sail a mini raft down the slow heavy river Moth; wet it for use in hand‐to‐hand‐combat; wrap it round your head to ward off noxious fumes or to avoid the gaze of the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal (a mindbogglingly stupid animal, it assumes that if you can't see it, it can't see you — daft as a bush, but very ravenous); you can wave your towel in emergencies as a distress signal, and of course dry yourself off with it if it still seems to be clean enough.
  • More importantly, a towel has immense psychological value. For some reason, if a strag (strag: nonhitchhiker) discovers that a hitchhiker has his towel with him, he will automatically assume that he is also in possession of a toothbrush, washcloth, soap, tin of biscuits, flask, compass, map, ball of string, gnat spray, wet-weather gear, space suit etc., etc. Furthermore, the strag will then happily lend the hitchhiker any of these or a dozen other items that the hitchhiker might have accidentally "lost.". What the strag will think is that any man that can hitch the length and breadth of the Galaxy, rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through and still know where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.
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Day #39 - The Tigger Song by .... Tigger (OF Course)

7/29/2014

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A wonderful about Tiggers
 Is Tigger's are wonderful things.
Their tops are made out of rubber,
their bottoms are made out of springs
They're bouncy, trouncey, pouncey, flouncey,
full of fun, fun, fun, fun, but
The most wonderful thing
about Tiggers is:
I'm the only one!
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Day #38 - Radio Announcer voice

7/28/2014

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Convicted Murderer John Crane denied parole

Ten years ago John Crane was convicted of hiring a hit man to kill his then wife Miranda. In a botched attempt, an innocent bystander was shot, but disappeared before medics could arrive on the scene.

John Crane professed his innocence throughout his trial and incarceration. Email correspondence, fingerprints, bank statements, and voice recordings were enough to convince the jury of his guilt even though the police never apprehended the hired hit man.

Upon his denial for parole, he issued the following statement through his attorney, Fred Grayson, “I am disappointed to be denied parole again, but I will not give up my fight.”


 
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Day #37 - Quote read by Vinnie the THug

7/27/2014

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My father always said, "Never trust anyone whose TV is bigger than their bookshelf." -- Emilia Clark
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Day #36 - There's a name for that ... by speedy Gonzalez

7/26/2014

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Knowing that a bunch of birds is called a flock is easy. Here are some unexpected names for animal groups:
A battery of barracudas
A congregation of alligators
A coalition of cheetahs
A congress of eels
A memory of elephants
A troubling of goldfish
A cackle of hyenas
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Day #35 - Joke from Readers digest by Pepe Le Pew

7/25/2014

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I'm pretty sure the dinosaurs died out when they stopped gathering food and started having meetings to discuss gathering food. -- From meetingboy.com
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Day #34 - Laugh Lines from Readers Digest by A Bimbo

7/24/2014

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I wish people were like the Internet videos and you could tap them lightly to see a clock of how much longer they are going to be talking. -- @JuliusSharpe
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Day #33 - Points to Ponder from Readers Digest

7/23/2014

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Under an endless rain of cosmic dust, the air is full of pollen, micro-diamonds and jewels from other planets... People go about their lives surrounded by the unseeable. -- Louie Schwartzberg
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Day #32 - Points to Ponder from Readers digest with German accent

7/22/2014

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Nothing has ever given us as much pleasure as our pocket money when we were 12 or our first wage at the end of that first exhausting week... Now we're ten times richer but we're not ten times happier. -- A.A. Gill
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